When I found out I was pregnant and checked in at my family doctor’s office for confirmation, one of the things Dr. S told me she needed to do was to check my weight. For someone like me who doesn’t regularly check her weight, I had no idea what the scale would say so it would be a surprise to the both of us. I stepped on the scale and it read 184lbs. I was so shocked that I asked her if I could do it again and she said yes. So, I hopped back on expecting a different result because surely, I weighed less than that like the other day. To my disappointment, the scale said 184lbs again. I know I said I didn’t care about what the scale said but still, I felt a way about the numbers !
I asked her if my weight was a concern and she told me, not at all, so although I was still shocked, I accepted it. After all, what could I do about it? This was the time where I should be concerned about the gains I would make, not losing it. But then again, how could I be at almost 200lbs PRIOR to pregnancy? If this really was the case – which is obviously was – how much more would I gain throughout the pregnancy? At what point had I let ‘myself go’? Oy vay !
The questions that flooded my mind seemed endless.
I’m the same person who said I didn’t care about the numbers and yet, here I was, obsessing over the fact that I weighed 184lbs at about 2-3 weeks of my pregnancy. Thankfully, that obsession didn’t last too long as I reminded myself that in order for this baby to thrive, he/she will add on to what I currently have and that there was nothing wrong with that. This was a small simple fact that I had to keep reminding myself of over and over again because otherwise, I would drive myself crazy. Of course, some women are able to boast that they only gain a minimal amount during pregnancy and I really wanted to be apart of that clique but the reality is that we all carry weight differently and every pregnancy is unique so, in short, I would have to suck it up and get over it.
As I said, the dramatics surrounding the news of my new weight was short-lived. As I continued to gain weight steadily, my mantra quickly became:
“I’m healthy, baby is healthy, that’s all that matters!”
You’re probably wondering how much I gained throughout my pregnancy right? Well, we’ll get to that later …