Motherhood After Dark

The End of Maternity Leave

Happy Tuesday Ladies & Gents!

Guess who has returned to work?! Well, this woman right here and let’s just say, it has been an incredibly difficult transition. For a few weeks leading up to my first day back at work, I contemplated what my life would look like and the feelings that would come along with it. About two weeks ago, Keith came home and within 10 minutes of sitting down with me, I was in tears. I cried partly out of sadness for having to leave our sweet girl in the care of someone else and also out of frustration.

I truly believed that this day would never come. When I say that, what I mean is that I hoped Keith would’ve won the lottery (mind you, we don’t even play it but still – it makes sense to me so it’s valid) and I would get to be a SAHM (Stay At Home Mom) or work part-time if I chose to do so. In the case that I had to return to work, I had hoped that I would’ve landed a position doing something I absolutely loved. Needless to say, here I am trying to walk with an intentional pep in my step as I head to an overnight shift – literally.

I am thankful for having not one, but two jobs, to return to but is it so bad that I wanted more for myself? I have fallen in love with this phase of my life where I get to take care of Charlotte and everything in the house. Some days, Keith comes home and there’s a meal awaiting him and other days there isn’t but he always has clean underwear and I think that makes me win every single time. I mean, who doesn’t want to always have clean clothes in their drawers and closet colour coordinated to near perfection every week?

I miss taking Charlotte to swimming classes and playgroup during our waking hours and making new friends in the nursing room at Scarborough Town Centre. I miss working on my brand in the little free time I had. Bottom line, I miss my maternity leave. It went by a lot faster than I thought it would. Truly, the days are long but the years are short.

I have returned to organized chaos in the work force and I have consumed more coffee out of desperation in the past two weeks than I ever have in my entire lifetime. But I’m here, I’m standing and I’m trying to make the best out of it until something better comes my way. Within the same breath, I am thankful for my mother-in-law and sister-in-law who have accepted the challenge of being accommodating of my crazy and inconsistent work schedule. Our sweet girl loves them both so much and my heart is at peace knowing that she is within their care!

Here’s to hoping better will come and in the mean time, that we will stay afloat and encouraged. We are on one helluva ride as we have added a new layer to our lifestyle and we can only pray that it will be a prosperous one!

Xx See you next week lovelies!